Eh...

I've begun to feel like I'm in quite a bit of a slump.  Mom says I'm depressed.  She's probably right.  I think I can deal with it.  I'm probably wrong.

One of the ways I plan on dealing with this is to start this blog, where I rant and ramble about whatever, just to get my feelings out.  Here goes nothing.

I suppose I should start with a bit of an introduction.  I'm a 20 year old college student at a public university in the midwest.  That's about as specific as I'm going to get: I've always been taught to keep my identity off the internet for fear of someone hunting me down and killing me or something... of course, in this day and age, that's a load of crap.  I guess it's just one of those things that was ingrained into my head, like brushing your teeth twice a day or eating at regular intervals.  Ever since I was a kid, I was taught to stay vague on the internet and never give out personal information.

Anyway, I live in the dorms on campus with one roommate and something like 48 housemates, although I don't know them all.  I'm not from around here, so I was pretty much the only person I knew when I got here.  I didn't really connect with anyone over the first two years I've lived here, so last fall I planned on getting into a single room on my floor.  Of course, the school decided to screw me over and gave me a new assignment with a new roommate...

I'm not complaining about the guy, he's friendly enough.  I just find it hard to focus on anything with him around.  He's not loud or disruptive or anything.  He's just... there.  He keeps to himself when he knows I want him to and he's pretty sociable when I need to rant to someone.

Anyway, I think that ranting to him has helped me out quite a bit.  I've cheered up and started to clean up my academics, which up to this point were steadily getting worse and worse.  So I figured, why not rant to the world instead?  I'm probably not going to get any followers since I'm just kind of improvising by doing this without telling anyone, but who knows?  Maybe this will help.  Or maybe I'll get bored of this and stop after today.  Only time will tell.

With my identity fairly hidden, I feel like I can be more open with you guys than my roommate.  So let's get into my first rambling.

Last night I had a nightmare.  It was different than most.  I don't usually dream, but when I do I either can figure out that I'm dreaming partway through the dream or I, upon looking back on the dream see major flaws in the story.  I've even had dreams that retconned themselves partway through, but I didn't notice until I woke up.  This dream, though... I just felt like it was happening.  I've never had a dream more vivid... and I've never smelt anything in a dream before.

I was in the woods near the house where I grew up back when my parents were still together.  It was night.  There was no wind, no sound, and very little to see other than the trees, which had strange black cocoons hanging from them.  These cocoons were huge, about the size of me.  As I looked at them, they began to make noise and crack open, and you wouldn't believe the smell coming out.  The cocoons opened to reveal terrible skeletal butterflies, dripping in blood and guts, that flew away into the night.  It was then that I woke up.

I've probably been looking through too many creepypastas or something.  Damn my time wasted on the internet.